The Path That I Choose

I always looked for my image of perfection while living, because my image of perfection was what drove my goals as a person. It was a combination of my experiences and dreams. The combination that I deemed suitable for me. It was all that I had fit into one.

I sought to be rational and not emotional, smart and not stupid and as a result, very goal oriented. I looked at my goals and made decisions that were sub-optimal based on which I decided to focus on. This has been my truth of who I am as a person since the very beginning. Why? Because I decided at one point in my life that I would rather make other people happy than deal with their unhappy state, essentially making every decision I made not my true intentions while maintaining my goal.

But I digress, the truth is, that in itself is a lie, because it's not that I would not make people unhappy, rather, I will do things for what I perceive to be the better change in the long run, without the knowledge of other people. It's a manipulation of sorts because of how I am as a person who expects people to be perfect, but it's the same person who is willing to accept that flaw and just look over it. It's funny, while these ideals are not the best choices, they are indeed a reflection of who I am. I'm not a mirror, to certain I project that view, which is probably a sign that you haven't really cracked it yet. Because I do have different personas, because everything has a different purpose, and different people need to see different things. It's a manipulation of my lies, and at the end of the day, I'm a liar because I can't ever tell myself the truth in all dimensions.

The question is simple, is telling people my true thoughts and intentions all the time worthwhile? Is never telling people my true thoughts and intentions the right way? No, both are clearly faulty, because you always have to be somewhere in the middle, you need to balance the two, because frankly, it's never your place to tell people what to do, but, it also is your place to some extent if they're talking to you. You shall see what it is I'm saying one day, maybe. Because in the bigger picture of things, it doesn't matter.